After four years I can finally say the finish line is well within sight. After all those days spent commuting to and from the University, stressing about getting off work early to make it to class on time, bitching about professors who have no right to be dishing out grades when they can't even teach, I think I can say, the journey's been interesting.I just finished my proposal defense today.
At first I thought this additional requirement to complete the MA degree was superfluous. Why put the student through all this when, being a graduate student, s/he should be considered capable of accomplishing his/her thesis right after that darned compre exam. But I realized this morning, it is a critical step in the process. The opinions and suggestions given by my panel were priceless. They helped fine tune the study and call out inconsistencies. From all their comments alone, at this stage, I realized, you need some help to prepare. Grad students who assume they are ready to take on an MA thesis could be in for some back-breaking work.
Initially I thought they would cut me down, chew me up and then spit me out. Quite the contrary: they were very compassionate, encouraging even. They helped open my mind to aspects of my own study I took for granted. They pointed out items I should review and realign, especially my framework. And that got me stoked: they encouraged me to come up with my own synthesis, and in effect my own framework for my study. This would be a first for me, the absolute zenith for an over-achieving nerd. Hubris be damned! Let's go make our own theoretical framework, shall we?
Some things they said I should look at: refocus my subject of study; put more importance on what is alternative rather than what is mainstream; attempt to synthesize the three theories used in my study; read the "law" of suppression of radical potential by Brian Winston. PHEW! That piqued my interest. It sounded so...subversive. I liked it. And I couldn't wait to get home (and finish this post) so I could look him up. But before they let me go, they had to deliberate (on my fate). They asked me to step out of the room. I waited at the lobby of the building, texted my boss and Benc about the progress. Suddenly I was called back in, and my adviser smiled and said, Congratulations, we have all recommended you to carry on with your thesis. The other panelists smiled and congratulated me, and showed me their signatures on the recommendation form. All I could do was heave a sigh of relief and thank them. They all said they were excited about the topic and would like to see me complete it within the sem. They wanted to publish it as soon as it was done. (No pressure, right?)
Wow! I couldn't believe the vote of confidence and the outpouring of encouragement. I couldn't wait to get started and show them how I was willing to dedicate myself to finishing, and finishing well. It helped that these words came from some of the most respected members of the academe -- people whom I believed in.
The finish line is one semester away. And I am 2 and 1/2 steps into the final stretch. This is the part where I put in everything I've got and go for that sprint. No looking back now.
See you at the finish line!
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