Benc and I were talking this morning about how we weren't feeling the Christmas bug yet. Our officemates echoed the same. It's as if, they said, there wasn't enough time in a day to get all their work done. "Parang laging may hinahabol" I wondered, was I not feeling the bug because I was also busy getting my wedding together and paying off suppliers? Was I missing the excitement because I know I wouldn't have enough money to go shopping for presents for everyone? Maybe I wasn't feeling enthusiastic because we've been busy closing projects and planning our strategies for the following year.
But I think the feeling changed a little while ago when I read Rej's reminiscing piece about the company and our colleagues. It was a nice, warm piece. I think it made me feel good because aside from letting everyone know how much she enjoyed herself working with us, she shared her feelings about each one, acknowledging their contributions to the company and in her own life.
I found this really sweet. I think I haven't been feeling the bug because I've been busy trying to make ends meet all year, and then I feel sad when I wonder if I am doing a good job at it. I guess I just needed to know I was making a difference. And it's funny because this was exactly what Benc was telling me yesterday when I was feeling bad about a little thing that triggered these emotions of unworthiness and uselessness. :)
AH! It's all twisted and convuluted now. I will not attempt to explain and give all of us a headache. Because just remembering it gives me a headache. Oy! I want to dump my brain, mix it up, fluff it up, then put it back in my head. Tila kailangan ng konting pagpag, para lang umayos ako ng konti. Hehe
At least I'm on my way to feeling a little cheer. Thank goodness. I know I'm getting old, but I'm no Scrooge. :)
1 comment:
ay. sana di ka naman naiyak. :P
-- rej
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