Meanwhile, back in Manila

People are flocking to the cemeteries now, to pay their respects to their dearly departed. It's amazing how generations of Pinoys have kept the practice of keeping vigil during undas, braving the traffic, the wet grounds (thanks to Cyclone Cimaron) and the throngs of people packing the hectares of burial ground.

When I was younger the concept of spending the night in the cemetery was so bizarre. This was partly because before I turned 19 we had never had a death in the family close enough to us to spend the night in a memorial park. I would stare at my classmates wide-eyed as they told me how they would sleep under the stars, wake up to the sound of transistor radios blaring and groups of people strumming guitars and singing loudly. How odd, I would think, that something so seemingly sentimental could turn into a real carnival. That was then.

Fourteen years later, not only did I find it bizarre and odd--I found it pretty annoying. At first it was a bit exciting to actually see the things classmates of old would tell me about. But after a while it just gets to be a pain. There's so much noise, so much litter, so much hassle. You have to spend so much of your time, money and effort just to spend some quiet moments with the person you miss. There's no privacy, no reverence. Right now I can see in my mind's eye the fake priest who kept going around one time we were there, pretending to bless the gravestones and the people gathered around it for a fee. He was obviously fake: he was in a tattered pair of acid wash jeans, was wearing a green sash around his neck and carried a small black book. May lightning strike me now if that was indeed a Bible. He didn't even look 18! Sheesh.

Today the commercial establishments set up shop as early as the 30th of October. And boy do they make a killing! McDo, Jollibee, Pizza Hut, Dunkin Donuts you name it - they're all there. And they even found a way to deliver. "Gravestone Pesayco, beside the Tree, fronting the western side of the ManMade Lake, area 20. Don't forget the ketchup."

I understand how, to some people, this is a sort of comfort for them. And I respect that. But sometimes I wish we could make it so that it's not so inconvenient for those who wish to remember their dead in a quiet place, in their own way. We don't have to necessarily spend the whole night making noise and turning the well-kept lawns into a dumpsite. We don't have to annoy the heck out of everyone with our pointless bellowing and rude guffaws. We can do it quietly, in our own space, in our own way. I think it's even more meaningful that way.

I'm glad this year I get to do it my way. I was excused from going to the cemetery because our office declared today a normal workday and though I offered to follow later, my mom said I should just stay put as traffic is terrible along South Super Highway. It's just as well. I might just get pissed and cranky from the drive once I arrive and be totally out of it. I'll commemorate undas my way for a change.

Yes, one of the perks of finally being independent.